Weight Loss Tips: How to Set New Year's Resolutions the RIGHT Way

Hey everyone, Dr. Angela here!

Do you set a New Years’ resolution to lose weight every year? According to one survey, 48% of people in 2019 wanted to lose weight, so you’re not alone. However, most people end up quitting their weight loss efforts by mid January… usually for sure by April. Have you ever wondered why?

If you don't know me, I am a medical doctor. I practice weight loss medicine exclusively, in Olympia, Washington. I also have an online program called Journey Beyond Weight Loss, where I teach people lifelong skills that they can lose weight and keep it off. 

That is my goal for you.

I don't want to have you losing it, gaining it, losing it, and gaining it! I really want to help you learn how to keep it off. And one of those things that you need to do, is to set your New Years Resolutions the right way.

So why do people end up quitting their weight loss goals? 

Well, I believe it’s because they’re setting the wrong resolutions for the wrong reasons, and they’re going about it the wrong way. 

So let’s talk about this, and let’s figure out the right way to do it. 

First, here are some wrong ways to set new year’s resolutions:  

Example #1. I will lose 30# by April 1st 2021. Now what could possibly be wrong with this resolution? It sounds reasonable. It’s measurable, right? You will know if you’ve hit that goal or not by April first. Many people will set resolutions to lose weight for a wedding or a class reunion. 

I call this dieting for a deadline. It works, but then all the lost weight is regained as you never learn any of the real skills that it takes to keep weight off. 

If you've done any goal setting courses before, they always say your goals need to be specific and measurable and achievable and all that good stuff. In that way, this is a good goal because it's specific and it's measurable. You get on the scale January 1st, you get on this scale April 1st and you will know whether you've lost 30 pounds.

Here’s the problem with this goal: Losing 30# does not mean you will lose 30# of FAT. The scale is not a good indicator of your progress. I’ve talked about this before. 

You have to be very careful to make sure you don’t lose important muscle mass while you lose fat.

Muscles are your fountain of youth!

Also, think about 30 pounds of fat loss. Let's say there is about 13, maybe 14 weeks worth of time between January 1st and April 1st. That means about two and a half pounds of fat loss a week in order to achieve a goal like that. 

Now, some people, if they start out at a very high weight, they can do that safely. But for most people, two and a half pounds of fat a week is way too much fat to lose. 

What I want you to understand is that fat is the repository of toxins. And so as you lose that fat, the toxins are going to be spilling out into your bloodstream and your liver has got to deal with it. Your kidneys have got to deal with it. You are going to excrete all of those toxins.

That's too much fat, too fast. That’s just plain hard on the liver and kidneys! Depending on where you’re starting at, this is likely way more fat than your body will be willing to release anyway. 

So you might want to set more realistic expectations. 

You don't want to be losing that much fat that quickly. My recommendation is reasonable goal would be like about a pound of fat a week. This is a safe amount, and your body will be able to handle it. It's more reasonable way to do it.

So that's my problem with that first example.

Example #2: I will train for a half marathon and run it in June 2021. Now, what could possibly be wrong with training for half marathon and running it?

Absolutely nothing is wrong with that goal - If it is to enjoy running! But if it's for weight loss, it's the wrong goal.

Here's what I want you to understand. Weight loss is one thing. Fitness is something totally different and you don't want to be using your fitness goals as a way to lose weight. 

You cannot 'out exercise' a bad diet. Weight loss happens in the kitchen. Actually, I have a friend who says weight loss happens in your head. And I agree with that.

Now if you like to run marathons and half marathons, I say go for it. But do it because you’re a runner and you enjoy running. Don’t do it to lose weight. As a matter of fact it’s become very clear to me that weight loss and fitness are two completely different things.

Too many people try to exercise as a way to burn calories and lose fat, but this doesn’t work. If you aren’t eating properly, you won’t lose fat no matter how much exercise you do. That’s because weight loss doesn’t happen in the gym. Weight loss happens in the kitchen. Fitness happens in the gym. And they’re two different things. 

You have to change how you eat if you want to lose weight. So I would not use exercise goals as a way of losing weight. I would use exercise goals as a way of expressing your vibrant, healthy body. 

So… if those are the WRONG ways to set weight loss New Years Resolutions, what are the RIGHT WAYS?

I’m going to show you a diagram that I adapted from a book called “Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones” by James Clear.  

The first thing is the outcome. This is what actually happens. What is the result? 

The second layer is the process or the habits. So what processes or habits do you put in place in order to achieve that outcome? 

The third thing is your identity. What kinds of thoughts do you have about yourself now?

What happens for most people when they embark on a weight loss goal is they're very, very focused on the outcome. And they're very, very focused on their process. 

So let's say it's the process is Weight Watchers. So let's say you join Weight Watchers and you are very focused on how much weight you have lost. How am I doing on my Weight Watchers diet? How much weight have I lost? How am I doing on my diet? How much weight have I lost? How am I doing on my diet? How much weight have I lost? How am I doing on my diet? 

Now think about what's going on here. What is the underlying identity driving this? The identity is I'm overweight and I need to lose weight. And unfortunately, when you're in that back and forth process outcome, the underlying identity never changes. 

People still think of themselves as somebody who's overweight. And the only real question is, ‘Am I in the process of trying to lose weight or am I eating whatever I want?’

So that's not going to work long-term. You have to make long-term shifts in the way you think about yourself, if you want a change in your long-term outcome. 

You want to make the change from the identity first. Think about your new identity and then you think about what processes or habits do I need to put in place that will achieve that new identity for myself. 

Then, you become this person! What kinds of things does this person do? The outcome takes care of itself. 

I want you to close your eyes for a minute and I want you to envision yourself on December 31st, 2021.

Think about ‘Who do I want to BECOME by December 31st, 2021? Who is this new me that I will get to greet? How does she think?’ 

Let’s imagine for a moment that she’s a size 6, she’s stable in her size 6 body, she’s thrown out all her clothes that are size 8 and above because she knows she’ll no longer need them. No question about this, right? All the clothes in the closet are size 6 and they all fit great. She bends and moves freely. She can run for 3 miles without stopping, she can hike for 5 miles no problem, she can get on an airline (we’ll be flying by then) and not have to worry about taking up too much space. She doesn’t focus on food at all. She’s too busy living her life.  

Who is this new future you? Ask your future self, how did you get here? What did you have to do to become this person?  

Here are some ideas.  

She learned to cook her own food. She learned how to plan ahead, and she makes grocery shopping and food prep an important and non-negotiable part of her week. She won’t be caught dead in a drive through restaurant ordering junk food. 

She’s stopped watching TV and eating in bed. 

She’s stopped the automatic habit of reaching for chips or candy when she’s stressed. She’s learned how to hit the pause button on that impulse and she knows what to do instead.  

She doesn’t let other people tell her what she should and shouldn’t eat. She doesn’t let anyone guilt her into eating food that she knows is toxic to her body. 

She pays no attention when someone says she has too many food rules … because she recognizes that most people are either binging or dieting and she’s done with that. She’s not going to binge any more and she’s not going to diet any more either.  

She just feeds her body nutritious food, consistently, and reaps all kinds of benefits in terms of peace of mind, mobility, and joy. 

So what kind of New Years Resolutions does someone like that make?

It’s not I want to lose X number of pounds by X date. It’s 'I’m going to spend my evenings reading or knitting or practicing piano instead of eating popcorn or chips in front of the TV.'

It’s 'I’m going to set aside 2-3 hours on a Sunday to plan my meals, go grocery shopping, and get a head start on my cooking for the week so I don’t end up starving in the Taco Bell drive thru again.'  

It’s' I’m going to monitor my tendencies to eat when I’m upset, I’m going to carry a journal around and WRITE instead of EAT and see what comes up.' 

These are the kind of resolutions that will be meaningful, that you won’t give up on, and that will lead you into a vibrant new future. 

If you want help with this, I’ll be doing a webinar called “How to Lose Weight and Get healthy, even during a Pandemic”, next week. I’ll put a sign up link in the comments. 

The webinar is Friday and Saturday, January 8th and 9th. There's several different times to choose from. If you can't make any of those times, just go ahead and sign up anyway, and we will send you the recording. 

It will behoove you to show up live to the webinar because I've got some greats as prizes for people who show up live! 

That would be one way that that you could get the help that you need. I want to really emphasize to you that losing weight and keeping it off as one of the hardest things that people can ever do.

It is not an easy thing to do. And I don't want you to take this resolution lightly. I want you to take it very seriously, and I want you to be willing to do whatever it takes to get your body healthy and vibrant and active again, so that you can live the healthy, joyous life that you were meant to live!

I wish you a very happy new year!

Dr. Angela

Webinar link: https://www.journeybeyondweightloss.com/webinar